FUCK THIS
HOTLINE

Some days don’t need advice.
They need a witness.

FUCK THIS
HOTLINE

Some days don’t need advice.
They need a witness.

THE FUCK IS THIS?

Official intake for petty emergencies, emotional damages, and incidents too humiliating to explain sober.

1

STEP IN SHIT?

Wife take the kids? Car won’t start? Self-checkout treat you like a repeat offender? We want the crash out.

2

REPORT IT!

Call it in. Name the damages. Include witnesses if they were laughing. We’ll open a case nobody asked for.

3

MOVE ON..

Nothing gets fixed. Nobody heals. But your bullshit has been heard, logged, and mishandled with confidence.

BEFORE THE TONE

NO THERAPY.
NO CUSTOMER SERVICE.
NO EMOTIONAL GROWTH.
JUST ONE UNNECESSARY HOTLINE.
FOR LIFE’S BREAKING POINTS.

BEFORE THE TONE

NO THERAPY.
NO CUSTOMER SERVICE.
NO EMOTIONAL GROWTH.
JUST ONE UNNECESSARY HOTLINE.
FOR LIFE’S BREAKING POINT.


Lines Open Soon

We’re not taking calls yet. Drop your email and we’ll let you know when the line goes live.

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